Monday, May 7, 2007

Heartbreak

This month I will be 29 and I think I have been around long enough to know a thing or two about heartbreak. The problem is, I may know about it, but I still haven't figured out how to avoid it. The truth is, you can't. It is inevitable- your heart will be broken, my heart will be broken.

Not only will it be broken, but it will be broken again and again for many different reasons, by many different people and sometimes by the same people over and over.

I feel like I am in a constant state of heartbreak, that at every corner there is another thing weighing me down. I know part of it is attitude and how you deal with the situation, but sometimes to deal isn't an option- you feel how you feel. And I feel deflated.

Whether it's romance or career or life or friends, I am heartbroken.

Yesterday at church the main topic seemed to be the light of Christ and faith in Christ. The atonement is an integral part of that. I always think about my sin when I think about the atonement and I try to "apply" the atonement into my life when I feel I need to repent, but it is so much more than that. The atonement can help with our heartbreak and our disappointments, whatever they may be. I need to remember that and try to apply that in my life.

It's hard to do when you are feeling sorry for yourself.

1 comment:

Carmen said...

I'm just so mad at us! We know better than to be this way, but we do it. I've always looked down on girls that chase after the "wrong guy", who really doesn't want them because he sucks to much to know better...and here we are! I hate us!

PS: I'm not mature enough to apply the atonement to my own stupidity. Is being stupid and going back for a weekly refresher course on "how to be stupid" a sin? I hope not, cause I have a lot of atoning to do then.

PSS: Now I will repent over my bad attitude and lack of humility.