Sunday, October 7, 2018

Where have you been?

I haven't written a blog post in almost 4 years. That's crazy. Just crazy.

I want to start writing again and I suppose this is my attempt to do so. This is for no one else but me, but if you're reading, I guess it can be for you too.

Since my last entry I moved and had a baby. My baby from 2014 is now a rambunctious 4 and a half year old and my NEW baby is an adorable, smiley and fat 5 month old, Mable Elaine. If you see me in person, ask me to sing the song I wrote for her when she was just days old. It's catchy. Almost TOO catchy.

We no longer reside in the City of Salt Lake. We love and miss it, but Portland, Oregon has been our new home for over a year now. It's  . . . growing on me. I like it. Really I do. I was just used to my life in Salt Lake. I lived there for 16 years after-all.

Oh, since my last entry I also found out I have a sister. YEP, you read that correctly, A SISTER. And she is fantastic (thank goodness). I am sure I will write about that at some point. I am going to visit her this coming weekend.

Hmm, what else, what else. Still happily married, still a clinical social worker, still love dance parties in the kitchen- so not a TON has changed. I mean, except for making another human with my body.

Mable Elaine has been a dream baby. She is happy and healthy and just so cute. She sleeps well and travels well. She loves her brother and laughs and smiles all the time. She tolerates all the things I insist on putting on her head (i.e. turbans and bows and the like). She's pretty dang amazing if I am being honest. She is named after mine and Nathaniel's paternal grandmothers. So her GREAT grandmothers. Sweet huh? Sometimes we call her Mabey or Mabes and even Missy Moo (I have no idea why, but it has stuck).

Sebastian has turned into quite the little man. He is funny and silly and smart and thoughtful and terrible and moody and loving and the best and the worst and very very 4. He loves being a big brother and I truly mean loves it. It doesn't matter where we are, he is yelling for everyone to, "LOOK AT MY BABY!!" He wants to make her laugh at all costs, even if that means mom is yelling at him to give her space or stop making fart noises (both of which do make her laugh). He gives her kisses freely and thinks she is adorable and I love seeing him be a big brother. It's been a hard transition for the both of us. It was just him and me for 4 years. That's a long time and the little squish threw a monkey wrench into that situation, an adorable chubby monkey wrench, but still.



I work one day a week in an actual office, seeing clients and I see other clients throughout the week over the internet (cool huh?). The rest of the time I am home or driving to school or swim class or soccer or the dentist or the doctor or the park- you get the idea.

I love my life.

BUT, it's also hard sometimes. I am pretty sure I have postpartum depression. Not a serious case by any means. In fact I don't feel depressed or particularly down, but sometimes I am SUPER irritable. And I think about how great my life is and I get MORE irritated for being irritated! Ah, mental illness, it never makes logical sense. I am going to see my doctor and see if she can help. I really want to be the best version of me for my kids and my husband and well, for me!

I am running again. It's been a while. I am training for a half marathon that I will run in a couple weeks. It's helped with losing the baby weight and it helps with anxiety and my energy level. BUT, I turned 40 this year (oh yeah, that happened too) and things hurt that didn't used to, like my knees! Hey, when did that happen??

Any who. Things are good. I can't complain. I probably will at some point and often do, but I will try not to.

On that note, welcome back (that was to me from me, in case you were wondering).